Dear Dominos Girl

Dear Dominos Girl,

I think I might owe you an apology.  I mean, you poor thing.  I don’t know how much they pay you, but I can say that no amount that is enough to make me want to walk through neighborhoods in a polyester uniform leaving coupons and sales ads in the middle of January.  So I feel for you already.  But then you got to my front door.  And I’m afraid there was a boy in the window who was terribly rude.  And I’d like to apologize for his behavior.

You see, Domino’s girl, that boy is named Oliver.  He’s usually fairly well-behaved, but he does bark at strangers in the window.  Usually it’s a regular bark, you know, just to sound a little tough and scary.  Unfortunately for you, this isn’t a usual weekend.  You see, Oliver’s daddy is gone this weekend hanging out with some friends from Purdue.  So Ollie is the man of the house.  And he takes that job very seriously.   Any noise out of the ordinary puts him in a real tizzy.  He wants to make sure that his mom and little brother are taken care of, and he will bark as loud as he can to make sure that happens.  Last night he laid in bed barking and growling at nothing for two hours just to make sure no one would come near.  Also unfortunately for you, his mommy has been very sick all day.  She’s been crying a lot because of the pain she’s in (headache mostly) and that is making him even more sensitive.  You see, he hasn’t left her side, and has been very cautious to make sure she’s okay.  But that really put him on edge…so when you walked up to our front door, you saw our boy unleash his crazy bark.  I’ve never really seen him puff out his chest at anyone like he did you.  It was interesting to say the least.

So….I guess what I’m saying Domino’s girl, is that you picked a bad day to approach our house, and I apologize for any stress or trauma caused by our family this afternoon.  We’re generally very nice people, and we love coupons.

Thanks for understanding,

Oliver’s Mom